Monday, September 9, 2013

Awkward Mom's latest post put me in a ranting mood.  (First of all, E.E., I think it's time you learned to use the bird.)

The gist of her story is that another mother had the gall to ask her if she'd mourned her C-section properly. "You haven't, have you? It's OK. But you really should if you want to move on in your motherhood journey. You are still a real mom even though you haven't really experienced birth."  Now, maybe I'm naive, being childless and all, but I've always assumed that being a "real mom" has absolutely nothing to do with how a child came into the world and everything to do with parenting said child.  What does this daft twat say to mothers who have adopted kids?  Or fathers, for that matter? 

Every mother I know had a Birth Plan.  For many, though, that plan didn't pan out.  Gone are the days of C-sections for the sake of "convenience."  The majority of women prefer being able to delivery vaginally, and will sit through hours of excruciating pain to get to that point.  But when the health and safety of mother and child are in question, a Caesarian can literally be a lifesaver.

I know moms who felt as if they were "failures" or inadequate because a C-section was required despite their best efforts to push that watermelon out of a lemon-sized opening.  Why is that?  Is it because of the new Mommy Culture of the 21st Century?  The all organic, all natural, no vaccinations, no sugar, gluten-free, Purell-wielding, no discipline, keeping their kids in plastic bubbles, nursing until their children are 4 years old, Bugaboo Brigade?

Look, I understand the desire to be the best mom, to do better than your mom, to have your kid grow up perfect and healthy, but for the love of Cheerios, please start understanding that every mom or dad is doing the best s/he can.  Sometimes, the best is getting your kid out the door without any stains on her shirt and other times, the best is bringing a beautiful healthy child into the world no matter what the egress point was.  Give each other a break.


1 comment:

  1. You are not naive, but a wise wonderful woman with sass to spare. I want you to join me on all my park playdates. I can attract the crazies and you can tell them where to bugaboo brigade. :) Love the post!

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