Maybe it's just because everyone's still thinking about their New Year's Resolutions, but I'm seeing a trend in the media that seems to encourage hyper-body consciousness more than usual. Or maybe it's because awards season is upon us, so we have plenty of chances to criticize stars' bodies and fashion choices. Whatever the reason, it's nuts.
I saw something posted on a friend's Facebook wall - "Losing weight makes you look good in clothes. Exercise makes you look good naked."
Yeah, and dieting makes you a bitch.
Here's the thing - I'm kind of an expert in dieting. Up until a few years ago, I was always on some sort of diet that always worked in the short term, but nothing really ever addressed the issues I had with food and body image and self-esteem there was no long term. If I was hungry, I was bitchy and if I felt ugly, I was bitchy. Vicious cycle.
If your self-image and self-worth is based on how you look, then I urge you to dig deeper. If you think your Significant Other (referred to as SO henceforth) will love you more or treat you better if you lose those 10 annoying pounds, that's not true. Your SO probably doesn't even notice that your thighs touch a little or that you have a few dimples on your booty. If your SO does notice, then he/she will love you enough to not say anything to you about them. If, on the other hand, your SO points it out in a nasty manner, then he or she isn't the one for you.
If, after you've been together a long time, your SO mentions that there's some concern for your health because you've gained 50lbs, then by all means, listen. Your SO is telling you that they want you to be around for a long time. If your SO strays and blames it on your weight gain, that's a lie. Or, rather, it's an excuse for their own flaws. Get rid of 'em, get healthy, and find someone who loves you no matter what. Because, when you think about it, one day we'll all be old and gray and liver-spotted and wrinkly and rotund - how you look when you're 80 won't matter as much as whether or not you still have things to laugh about together.
Another quote that irritates me to no end is "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." Horseshit. I know a lot of thin women who are absolutely miserable. If 2lbs makes a difference in how your day goes, then eat a Fiber One, have a good poop and move on from it. Life is short, way too short to avoid cheese and wine and chocolate all the time. Unwinding with your friends over a bottle of wine at the end of a difficult week tastes so much better than thin feels.
Now, it might sound like I'm saying "Go ahead and let yourself go" but that's not it. I'm saying that self-worth should not be based on a number on the scale. If anything, look at your overall health and make tweaks there, but that should still only be one component of your self-worth.
I definitely have my struggles. I'm a fat chick - I encounter judgement and looks of disdain from strangers a few times a week and, in short, it's extremely unpleasant . However, I know that if I didn't give others a chance because of a split-second impression, I would've lost out on a lot of really wonderful friends, even my husband. If those disdainful strangers don't want to know me, then that's their problem. They'll never have the pleasure of knowing how funny, smart, caring, and insightful I can be. They'll never know the joy of my freshly baked apple bread or bacon mac 'n cheese. If they need a shoulder to cry on at 2am, it won't be mine. I won't be the one to take them shopping and give them an honest fashion opinion. We all have flaws and peccadilloes - I feel that recognizing that puts you on a path to acceptance.
We should always strive to better versions of ourselves, but our waistlines should not be the sole focus. Besides, I'd rather have my biggest flaw apparent to the world, rather than be a skinny bitch who lets her crazy out at the most inopportune moments! :-)
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Hot Monkey Love Bacon Mac & Cheese
When one moves to South Carolina, there are a few changes one must make in order to acclimate more quickly.
1. When ordering Tea at a restaurant, expect it to come sweetened with real sugar or simple syrup, diabeetus be damned. If you want to use an artificial sweetener or want it hot, you must be extra clear with your waitress by stating "UN-sweet Tea" or "HOT Tea."
2. Speed limits are really the combined average of drivers on any one particular road; you can either go 15 over or 15 under, but never the actual posted limit.
3. If you need to go out on a Sunday, you must do so before the Lord gets out or wait until the late afternoon. Driving anytime between 10am and 1pm is ill-advised, unless you want to be stuck waiting for a parade of church-goers' minivans. Additionally, dining anywhere during the early afternoon hours will likely be the most trying part of your day as you tangle with children and mouth-breathers.
4. Everything is made better with pork.
On that last note, let me tell you about Hot Monkey Love Bacon Mac and Cheese!
My Mom got this recipe from Giada DiLaurentiis, but since I don't feel her boobs, I mean *she* can cook very well, I've adapted it into a delicious dish of death.
1lb bacon
12 oz penne noodles
1/2 stick of salted butter
1/2 cup flour
8 oz 2% milk (or half & half if you want to up the artery-clogging potential)
2 8oz packages of Kraft Italian 5 Cheese mix with a "touch of Philly" (it actually does melt better), reserve 4 oz of cheese for crust
1 tbs garlic powder
pinch of dry mustard
1/2 cup plain breadcrumbs
Before you cook the bacon, cut it up into 1/2 inch pieces so they'll all get crispy. Nobody wants flaccid bacon in their mac & cheese.
Cook the bacon to a crispy awesome meat candy texture. Drain on paper towels, blot to remove surface grease because it will help keep the bacon crispy.
Cook your noodles until they're al dente - they'll cook a little more in the oven so you don't want them too gummy at the start.
In a 1qt saucepan, melt the butter. Sprinkle in flour while whisking furiously to avoid lumps. Congrats, you've made a roux! Keep whisking and let it cook over low-medium heat for a few minutes until it turns slightly dark blond to remove that raw flour taste.
Slowly pour the milk into the saucepan, whisking life your life depends on it, until it's thoroughly combined and add the garlic and mustard. Congrats, now you've made a bechamel!
Raise the heat slightly to bring the sauce up to cheese melting temperature. When you see little bubbles form at the sides of the pot, you're ready to add the cheese.
(I find it helpful to dump 3/4 of the cheese onto a plate because you have to keep whisking and it's pretty much an exercise in ineptitude to keep whisking while trying to get your hand out of the bag of cheese without making a giant mess. Or, as Patches O'Houlihan would say, "looking like a retard trying to hump a doorknob.")
On low heat, sprinkle the cheese in ONE handful at a time, continuously whisking in a figure-8 motion, until the cheese has thoroughly combined before adding the next handful. This technique, taught by the Swiss and their delightful fondue masters (or whatever nationality of the waiter at Melting Pot), ensures a velvety smoothness sexy enough for even the most ardent vegan.
In a greased 9x13 cassarole dish, combine the noodles, sauce, and bacon until it's almost wrong. Sprinkle breadcrumbs and remaining 4oz of cheese lovingly over the top. Don't worry if it's soupy because it will thicken during the bake.
Bake in 350 degree oven for 35-45 minutes until the cheese crust is golden brown and bubbly.
Yes, it will look so damn good coming out of the oven that you'll want to hump it, but keep it in your pants and let it cool for at least 10 minutes before serving. I hope you enjoy!
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Jambalaya in 30 or less
Well, we finally had a little money and I could actually afford to really cook for the first time in months. Sure, I've made baked ziti, chicken pot dumplins (hybrid of chicken pot pie and chicken 'n dumplins), and stroganoff, but those are what I consider cheap staples. Nothing too fancy and definitely not worth writing about.
However, tonight - tonight I got to make jambalaya! With andouille, not kielbasa! And it only took 30 minutes! (which means it'll be spicy as hell come tomorrow!)
Okay, it wasn't true N'Awlins Jambalaya, but based on a suggestion from the husband coupled with a cold weather snap, it was perfect. And the husband was so excited by how good it smelled, he even left his video game to watch it simmer and grope my butt, so that's saying something!
White rice, about 4 cups cooked. Use whatever you like, but I go with the boil-in-bag variety so I can use a few tablespoons of the starchy cooking water to thicken the jambalaya.
1/4 cup diced celery
1/2 cup white onions
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tbs canola oil
2 tbs cajun seasoning (BAM!)
1 tbs cayenne pepper (more or less depending on heat preference)
1 rope andouille sausage, sliced diagonally into 1/2 inch pieces
2 cans fire-roasted diced tomatoes (I use Hunt's - you don't have to go fire-roasted, but it's soooo good)
1 tbs chicken soup base (or 2 small boullion cubes)
3 scallions, finely chopped (garnish, optional)
In a stock pot over medium heat, add the oil, celery, garlic, white onions, and spices. Get everything nice and coated and let it sweat for a few minutes until the onions are almost translucent. Add the sliced sausage and stir. You're basically letting the fat in the sausage melt and get all delicious.
After 3 minutes, add the tomatoes. Bring up to a boil, reduce to simmer and add the chicken base. Add a few tbs of the starchy rice water. Let it simmer for 20-25 minutes until it's reduced by 1/3, stirring occasionally.
The photo doesn't do it justice since the flash was too close, but trust me, it's awesome. Ladle over rice, sprinkle some scallions, and enjoy.
However, tonight - tonight I got to make jambalaya! With andouille, not kielbasa! And it only took 30 minutes! (which means it'll be spicy as hell come tomorrow!)
Okay, it wasn't true N'Awlins Jambalaya, but based on a suggestion from the husband coupled with a cold weather snap, it was perfect. And the husband was so excited by how good it smelled, he even left his video game to watch it simmer and grope my butt, so that's saying something!
White rice, about 4 cups cooked. Use whatever you like, but I go with the boil-in-bag variety so I can use a few tablespoons of the starchy cooking water to thicken the jambalaya.
1/4 cup diced celery
1/2 cup white onions
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tbs canola oil
2 tbs cajun seasoning (BAM!)
1 tbs cayenne pepper (more or less depending on heat preference)
1 rope andouille sausage, sliced diagonally into 1/2 inch pieces
2 cans fire-roasted diced tomatoes (I use Hunt's - you don't have to go fire-roasted, but it's soooo good)
1 tbs chicken soup base (or 2 small boullion cubes)
3 scallions, finely chopped (garnish, optional)
In a stock pot over medium heat, add the oil, celery, garlic, white onions, and spices. Get everything nice and coated and let it sweat for a few minutes until the onions are almost translucent. Add the sliced sausage and stir. You're basically letting the fat in the sausage melt and get all delicious.
After 3 minutes, add the tomatoes. Bring up to a boil, reduce to simmer and add the chicken base. Add a few tbs of the starchy rice water. Let it simmer for 20-25 minutes until it's reduced by 1/3, stirring occasionally.
The photo doesn't do it justice since the flash was too close, but trust me, it's awesome. Ladle over rice, sprinkle some scallions, and enjoy.
Friday, November 25, 2011
Italian Sausage Pizza Pasta (or what do you make with bulk Italian Sausage?)
We've been living in South Carolina for 3 months now and I'm just getting used to the layout of my new favorite grocery store, Ingles. That's something you don't really think about when moving - not being able to whiz through your shopping list because you don't know where a damn thing is at the new store. My old Jewel was familiar and comfortable - I automatically listed items on paper in the same order as I would go through the store. I had my favorite brands of deli cheese and great deals on Coke products (which are almost always full price here since Pepsi was "born in the Carolinas." Seriously, that's their tagline.) and non-processed foods like milk, veggies, and meats were sold at reasonable prices. A gallon of milk is almost $5 down here!
Italian Sausage Pizza Cassarole
Anyway, at a neighbor's suggestion I ventured over the scary 6 lane road into a residential area and found the Ingles Supermarket. She suggested trying their bulk Italian sausage (1lb for $1.36?! ok!) but when I got home, I realized I had no idea what to do with it. Turns out, both the hubs and myself were impressed with the end result!
Italian Sausage Pizza Cassarole30 minute prep, 5 minute cook
Ingredients
1 lb bulk Italian Sausage (or Jennie-O Turkey Italian Sausage, casings removed)
1 pint pre-sliced Baby Bella mushrooms
1 clove fresh garlic, minced
1 red pepper, diced
2 scallions, greens only, sliced (set aside)
2 roma tomatoes, diced (set aside)
2 cups rotini shaped pasta (I used the mini rotinis)
2 tsps butter, separated
1 tsp AP flour
2 cups milk
1 tsp cajun seasoning
1 tsp fresh basil (I get the tubed kind in the veggie section at the store, but if you only have dried basil, use a 1/2 tsp)
1/ 2 tsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp red pepper flakes (optional)
4 cups shredded Italian cheese blend (I used Kraft's 5 Italian Cheeses, but Sargento makes a similar product. As long as it has mozzarella, parmesan, and provolone) Set aside 1 cup to sprinkle on top
1. Bring water to boil and cook noodles per the package's instructions. Drain and set aside.
2. While water's heating, cook sausage thoroughly, breaking it up into crumbles as it cooks. Drain on paper towel and set aside.
3. In the same skillet, melt 1 tsp of butter. Add mushrooms, garlic, and red peppers. Keep on low-medium heat to "sweat" the veggies as you saute. You don't want the garlic to burn. (The water should be boiling now!) Cook veggies as long as the noodles boil. Remove from heat.
4. Drain and set aside noodles. In the same pot, melt 1 tsp of butter on low heat. Add 1 tsp of flour and whisk away to make a roux. When it turns into a flaxen yellow blond color, it's ready for the milk.
5.While continuously whisking, slowly add the milk. After a few minutes of whisking, roux should be fully incorporated and tiny bubble should appear on the sides. Congrats, your roux is now a bechamel sauce and the bubbles indicate you've reach it's full thickening power! Add oregano, basil, garlic, optional pepper flakes and cajun herbs.
6.Continue stirring and add the 1st handful of cheese. Whisk until fully incorporated and repeat until all but 1 cup of cheese is in the sauce. Remove from heat.
7. In a cassarole dish, add noodles, sausage, sauteed veggies, scallions, tomatoes, and cheese sauce. Combine and then sprinkle the remaining cheese.
8. Set dish under broiler for a few minutes until the cheese is melted and bubbly. Cool for a few minutes then serve with salad or garlic bread.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Pollo al Mattone (or Mighty Brickhouse Chick) she's a brick...house She's mighty mighty!
Hey Grill Fiends!
I don't know if this happens to you, but it seems like every damn time I grill chicken (breast, pieces, whatever) it always takes foooorrrreeevvvveerrrrr to get done. Ha! But not this time! This is my new favorite (and easy) way to cook it.
What you'll need are 2 bricks (we have a couple laying around the basement from when they built the house), a whole chicken (innards removed, skin on), and a marinade.
Now, you can pretty much choose any marinade you like - perhaps you're feeling spicy - but I went Mediterranean.
Marinade
3 large cloves of garlic, peeled
1/4 cup fresh basil leaves
1 tsp oregano
juice from one lemon
1/2 cup olive oil (I used "extra light tasting" since I'm not a fan of EVOO's taste unless it's on bread)
(you could add a dash or two of balsamic vinegar if you like)
Pulse in the food processor (yeah, like I'm gonna mortar&pestle that out, ha!) for about 30 seconds. You want it to be thick, but not like a paste. More like a chunky dressing, so if you need to, add more oil.
Split the bird down the backbone so it's spread eagle. Rinse off, pat dry. Stick it in a lasagna pan, or at least some container with higher walls, and pour half the marinade on the outside. Massage it in well and then flip the bird over to massage in the remaining half of the marinade. Cover with foil or plastic wrap and let it sit in the icebox for a few hours.
After a few hours, get the grill going. You want it medium hot when you cook, so keep that in mind. (Medium heat = bare hand over the center of the coals for no longer than 4-5 seconds)
Since our bricks had been in the basement with creepy-crawlies for years, we washed them off :) Wrap them in foil.
Now to grill:
Liberally salt & pepper the bird's skin and tuck the wings underneath so they don't burn. If you are using regular table salt & pepper, don't be as liberal as I am with my grinders.
Let as much marinade as possible to drip off the chicken before putting it on the grill. Oil + flames = HOLY SHIT! MY EYEBROWS!
Place the chicken SKIN SIDE DOWN directly over the center. Place a brick on each side of the breastbone so it weighs on the chicken. Resist the urge to fiddle with it - just let it cook for 14 minutes.
After 14 minutes, the skin should be browned and crispy. Using tongs, and perhaps a helper, flip the chicken over to cook in the inside. No need to replace the bricks as the chicken's already flattened. You want the breast temperature to get to about 165 and the thigh to about 150. Carry-over heat will even it out as you let it rest under foil for 10 minutes. Carve and enjoy!
In my family, we don't see a point to getting the grill going if we're cooking only one thing, so I chose side dishes at the last minute. This is my new favorite way to make potatoes on the grill!
Buttery Grilled Taters
3-4 Yukon gold or new potatoes (waxy are better than starchy because you don't have to peel them)
2 tbs butter
1tsp garlic powder
salt & pepper
Dice potatoes into 1/2 inch cubes as uniform in size as possible to ensure quick, even cooking. Melt the butter in the microwave until it's fully liquid. Sprinkle salt, garlic powder, and pepper into the butter and toss with diced potatoes.
Make a little round foil "boat." (I could've used an aluminium pie pan, but why bother?) Make sure to make it double-thick so it doesn't burn on the grill. Spread buttered tater pieces into the boat in a single layer. Make a little foil hat and cover it loosely. Place on the grill for about 20 minutes. They'll be nice and soft and browned and buttery - like hash browns but not as crispy. I did this when we first poured the hot coals into the grill so we didn't waste that high heat before putting the chicken on. Nom nom nom soooo good.
My Favorite Grilled Asparagus
bunch of asparagus, woody ends chopped off.
Put them in a freezer bag, drizzle in some olive or canola oil (2 tsp at most depending on how big the bunch is). Sprinkle in some Montreal Steak seasoning (I don't know why it's so good on asparagus, but it is! The spices get crunchy on the grill) and mush it all around so everybody gets a little wet.
Place on the grill (make sure they don't fall in! I lost 9 by my brother's count this time) and let them cook for about 10 minutes. The tops should be slightly charred, the bodies should be bright green and tender, meaning if you pick one up with tongs, it will be a little floppy but not flaccid. Nobody likes flaccid asparagus.
The best part about this chicken under a brick meal is that all the pieces - breast, leg, thigh - was done at the same time! And it was juicy!
The downside, of course, is asparagus pee. Yuck.
I don't know if this happens to you, but it seems like every damn time I grill chicken (breast, pieces, whatever) it always takes foooorrrreeevvvveerrrrr to get done. Ha! But not this time! This is my new favorite (and easy) way to cook it.
What you'll need are 2 bricks (we have a couple laying around the basement from when they built the house), a whole chicken (innards removed, skin on), and a marinade.
Now, you can pretty much choose any marinade you like - perhaps you're feeling spicy - but I went Mediterranean.
Marinade
3 large cloves of garlic, peeled
1/4 cup fresh basil leaves
1 tsp oregano
juice from one lemon
1/2 cup olive oil (I used "extra light tasting" since I'm not a fan of EVOO's taste unless it's on bread)
(you could add a dash or two of balsamic vinegar if you like)
Pulse in the food processor (yeah, like I'm gonna mortar&pestle that out, ha!) for about 30 seconds. You want it to be thick, but not like a paste. More like a chunky dressing, so if you need to, add more oil.
Split the bird down the backbone so it's spread eagle. Rinse off, pat dry. Stick it in a lasagna pan, or at least some container with higher walls, and pour half the marinade on the outside. Massage it in well and then flip the bird over to massage in the remaining half of the marinade. Cover with foil or plastic wrap and let it sit in the icebox for a few hours.
After a few hours, get the grill going. You want it medium hot when you cook, so keep that in mind. (Medium heat = bare hand over the center of the coals for no longer than 4-5 seconds)
Since our bricks had been in the basement with creepy-crawlies for years, we washed them off :) Wrap them in foil.
Now to grill:
Liberally salt & pepper the bird's skin and tuck the wings underneath so they don't burn. If you are using regular table salt & pepper, don't be as liberal as I am with my grinders.
Let as much marinade as possible to drip off the chicken before putting it on the grill. Oil + flames = HOLY SHIT! MY EYEBROWS!
Place the chicken SKIN SIDE DOWN directly over the center. Place a brick on each side of the breastbone so it weighs on the chicken. Resist the urge to fiddle with it - just let it cook for 14 minutes.
After 14 minutes, the skin should be browned and crispy. Using tongs, and perhaps a helper, flip the chicken over to cook in the inside. No need to replace the bricks as the chicken's already flattened. You want the breast temperature to get to about 165 and the thigh to about 150. Carry-over heat will even it out as you let it rest under foil for 10 minutes. Carve and enjoy!
"The lady's stacked and that's a fact - ain't holding nothing back!"
In my family, we don't see a point to getting the grill going if we're cooking only one thing, so I chose side dishes at the last minute. This is my new favorite way to make potatoes on the grill!
Buttery Grilled Taters
3-4 Yukon gold or new potatoes (waxy are better than starchy because you don't have to peel them)
2 tbs butter
1tsp garlic powder
salt & pepper
Dice potatoes into 1/2 inch cubes as uniform in size as possible to ensure quick, even cooking. Melt the butter in the microwave until it's fully liquid. Sprinkle salt, garlic powder, and pepper into the butter and toss with diced potatoes.
Make a little round foil "boat." (I could've used an aluminium pie pan, but why bother?) Make sure to make it double-thick so it doesn't burn on the grill. Spread buttered tater pieces into the boat in a single layer. Make a little foil hat and cover it loosely. Place on the grill for about 20 minutes. They'll be nice and soft and browned and buttery - like hash browns but not as crispy. I did this when we first poured the hot coals into the grill so we didn't waste that high heat before putting the chicken on. Nom nom nom soooo good.
My Favorite Grilled Asparagus
bunch of asparagus, woody ends chopped off.
Put them in a freezer bag, drizzle in some olive or canola oil (2 tsp at most depending on how big the bunch is). Sprinkle in some Montreal Steak seasoning (I don't know why it's so good on asparagus, but it is! The spices get crunchy on the grill) and mush it all around so everybody gets a little wet.
Place on the grill (make sure they don't fall in! I lost 9 by my brother's count this time) and let them cook for about 10 minutes. The tops should be slightly charred, the bodies should be bright green and tender, meaning if you pick one up with tongs, it will be a little floppy but not flaccid. Nobody likes flaccid asparagus.
The best part about this chicken under a brick meal is that all the pieces - breast, leg, thigh - was done at the same time! And it was juicy!
The downside, of course, is asparagus pee. Yuck.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Oh, Panko, how I love thee... Fiery Buttermilk fried Chicken
Alright, I admit it, since I came back from vacation, I've kinda' let myself go... I think it's partly due to the November-like spring we've been having, but I've also felt a bit uninspired. Uninspired to kick ass during my workouts, uninspired to write, uninspired to cook. My get up and go must've got up and went ~ what song is that again?
Anyway, vacation is over. Sometimes the lightning bolt doesn't strike you ~ sometimes, you've just gotta stick your finger in the socket.
As I said in an earlier post, I pretty much figured out the flavor components to Buffalo Wild Wings' Asian Zing sauce. I wanted something spicy, but not so heavy that I had to lay on the couch like a manatee all night. Hence,
Zinging Salad with Fiery Buttermilk "Fried" Chicken Bites
serves 4 (or 6 if you add all the optional veggies)
As my husband said earlier, "I wish I'd discovered Panko earlier in life." Seriously. With Panko breadcrumbs, you can "fry" your chicken in the oven and still that wonderfully crunchy coating without using oil and ending up explaining that scar over your eye from an exploding oil incident for the next decade.
As you know, the husband and I are wary of mystery chicken, so I usually get 4 "recipe ready" boneless, skinless breasts, which I then trim even more until they resemble squares. Tendons don't belong in your body unless they're connecting your own muscles and bones, knowwhatImean? After they're in neat little rectangles, I cut them into 1"-2" inch pieces as uniformly as possible to ensure even cooking.
Fiery Buttermilk Fried Chicken
Ingredients
2 cups Buttermilk
1 tbs fresh chili paste (in the Asian or Ethnic food section at the grocery store)
1 tsp minced garlic
1 tsp minced ginger
1 tbs soy sauce
Approx 1 lb cubed chicken breast, uncooked.
Approx 2 cups Panko breadcrumbs
salt & pepper to taste
In either a gallon zippy bag or a quart Tupperware container (with a lid that really seals well), combine all ingredients. Secure container and shake well to combine. Drop chicken chunks into the buttermilk mixture, get everything swimming, seal and refrigerate for at least 1 hour, giving it a stir or shake at least once.
Zinging Dressing (this is thinner than a sauce, but not technically a vinaigrette because there's no vinegar)
Ingredients
All the pineapple juice from 1 can of diced or crushed pineapple
1 tsp fresh chili paste (or more if you want it super hot)
1/2 tsp freshly minced garlic
1/2 tsp freshly minced ginger
2 tbs honey
2 tbs canola oil
couple of dashes soy sauce
While the chicken hangs out in the fridge in their buttermik bath, combine all the ingredients in a container with a lid that seals securely (unless you want to clean spots off your ceiling and cabinets). Close container and shake well for about 30 seconds to emulsify mixture and refrigerate. The oil will separate out in the fridge so don't forget to shake well again before serving!
Back to the chicken...
Preheat your oven to 400 degrees and cover 2 half-sheet baking pans in foil for easy clean-up. In a gallon zippy bag, pour in your 2 cups on Panko. Give the chicken a stir and empty some of the buttermilk into the sink, careful to keep those chicken chunks in, to avoid making a HUGE mess during transfer. Using tongs, transfer 6-7 pieces of chicken into the Panko bag, allowing the excess liquid to drain off first. Seal the bag, shake it up to get 'em all nice and coated. Then transfer coated chicken to pans, leaving about 1-2 inches of space between them.
The one problem with baking Panko is that it doesn't really "brown" like fried chicken. No big deal, but if you want that effect, you can drizzle a little melted butter over each piece OR spritz with I Can't Believe It's Not Butter spray (every good calorie counter should have some on hand - it's great for unsticking noodles before saucing them instead of using a pat of butter)
When you've got all the chicken coated, bake on racks in the oven's middle position, about 25 - 30 minutes. Depending on your oven, you'll probably need to flip the pans around at least once to keep from burning.
Now, the salad.
Butter lettuce, either 2 chopped heads OR 1 bag of pre-washed "Butter Lovers" lettuce
1 red pepper, finely diced
1/2 cup shelled, cooked edamame (why can't we just call them soybeans? not romantic enough?)
1/2 cup shredded red cabbage
1/4 cup matchstick carrots, optional
2 scallions, greens only, finely chopped, optional
2 baby bok choy, chopped, optional
Chow Mein noodles for garnish, optional
Mingle the veggies, place on a serving plate or your own dinner plate, arrange chicken chunks on top, spoon Zinging Dressing on top (it's best if each piece of chicken has a little drizzle). If it's too spicy, cool it down with another drizzle of ranch dressing.
Prepare for your mind to be blown:
At BDub's, 6 Boneless Asian Zing have about 528 calories, 12 wings are over 1000 calories. Add the ranch dressing for dipping and you're talking another 150-300 calories. As for fat, it's about 52 grams with no fiber at all. That's just Wings - no fries, no salad, nothing else - just Wings, sauce, & ranch dressing. At least there are 52 grams of protein...
With my recipe, we're looking at under 400 calories for the entire serving and only about 9 grams of fat, PLUS we get at least 4 grams of fiber and you've added 2 servings of veggies to your day's tally!
My husband, who is not a fan of salad by any means, could not stop raving about this. Usually, I'll make something intended to be eaten as a salad, but instead he'll cram all the veggies down separately as quickly as possible, and then eat the "more enjoyable" protein component. "You actually got me to mix the chicken INTO the salad!" he exclaimed before demanding this recipe go into the regular rotation.
I prefer using Buttermilk when I oven fry because panko sticks better to it than eggs. Even when I deep fry chicken, I prefer using panko and buttermilk rather than the traditional flour, eggs, breading route. It seems to stay crispier. This Panko technique is reminiscent of Shake 'N Bake (remember that commercial?!), so it's fun for little chefs. And if you're not feeling the salad, just make the chicken and have your own "boneless wing night" at home :)
Anyway, vacation is over. Sometimes the lightning bolt doesn't strike you ~ sometimes, you've just gotta stick your finger in the socket.
As I said in an earlier post, I pretty much figured out the flavor components to Buffalo Wild Wings' Asian Zing sauce. I wanted something spicy, but not so heavy that I had to lay on the couch like a manatee all night. Hence,
serves 4 (or 6 if you add all the optional veggies)
As my husband said earlier, "I wish I'd discovered Panko earlier in life." Seriously. With Panko breadcrumbs, you can "fry" your chicken in the oven and still that wonderfully crunchy coating without using oil and ending up explaining that scar over your eye from an exploding oil incident for the next decade.
As you know, the husband and I are wary of mystery chicken, so I usually get 4 "recipe ready" boneless, skinless breasts, which I then trim even more until they resemble squares. Tendons don't belong in your body unless they're connecting your own muscles and bones, knowwhatImean? After they're in neat little rectangles, I cut them into 1"-2" inch pieces as uniformly as possible to ensure even cooking.
Fiery Buttermilk Fried Chicken
Ingredients
2 cups Buttermilk
1 tbs fresh chili paste (in the Asian or Ethnic food section at the grocery store)
1 tsp minced garlic
1 tsp minced ginger
1 tbs soy sauce
Approx 1 lb cubed chicken breast, uncooked.
Approx 2 cups Panko breadcrumbs
salt & pepper to taste
In either a gallon zippy bag or a quart Tupperware container (with a lid that really seals well), combine all ingredients. Secure container and shake well to combine. Drop chicken chunks into the buttermilk mixture, get everything swimming, seal and refrigerate for at least 1 hour, giving it a stir or shake at least once.
Zinging Dressing (this is thinner than a sauce, but not technically a vinaigrette because there's no vinegar)
Ingredients
All the pineapple juice from 1 can of diced or crushed pineapple
1 tsp fresh chili paste (or more if you want it super hot)
1/2 tsp freshly minced garlic
1/2 tsp freshly minced ginger
2 tbs honey
2 tbs canola oil
couple of dashes soy sauce
While the chicken hangs out in the fridge in their buttermik bath, combine all the ingredients in a container with a lid that seals securely (unless you want to clean spots off your ceiling and cabinets). Close container and shake well for about 30 seconds to emulsify mixture and refrigerate. The oil will separate out in the fridge so don't forget to shake well again before serving!
Preheat your oven to 400 degrees and cover 2 half-sheet baking pans in foil for easy clean-up. In a gallon zippy bag, pour in your 2 cups on Panko. Give the chicken a stir and empty some of the buttermilk into the sink, careful to keep those chicken chunks in, to avoid making a HUGE mess during transfer. Using tongs, transfer 6-7 pieces of chicken into the Panko bag, allowing the excess liquid to drain off first. Seal the bag, shake it up to get 'em all nice and coated. Then transfer coated chicken to pans, leaving about 1-2 inches of space between them.
The one problem with baking Panko is that it doesn't really "brown" like fried chicken. No big deal, but if you want that effect, you can drizzle a little melted butter over each piece OR spritz with I Can't Believe It's Not Butter spray (every good calorie counter should have some on hand - it's great for unsticking noodles before saucing them instead of using a pat of butter)
When you've got all the chicken coated, bake on racks in the oven's middle position, about 25 - 30 minutes. Depending on your oven, you'll probably need to flip the pans around at least once to keep from burning.
Now, the salad.
Butter lettuce, either 2 chopped heads OR 1 bag of pre-washed "Butter Lovers" lettuce
1 red pepper, finely diced
1/2 cup shelled, cooked edamame (why can't we just call them soybeans? not romantic enough?)
1/2 cup shredded red cabbage
1/4 cup matchstick carrots, optional
2 scallions, greens only, finely chopped, optional
2 baby bok choy, chopped, optional
Chow Mein noodles for garnish, optional
Mingle the veggies, place on a serving plate or your own dinner plate, arrange chicken chunks on top, spoon Zinging Dressing on top (it's best if each piece of chicken has a little drizzle). If it's too spicy, cool it down with another drizzle of ranch dressing.
Prepare for your mind to be blown:
At BDub's, 6 Boneless Asian Zing have about 528 calories, 12 wings are over 1000 calories. Add the ranch dressing for dipping and you're talking another 150-300 calories. As for fat, it's about 52 grams with no fiber at all. That's just Wings - no fries, no salad, nothing else - just Wings, sauce, & ranch dressing. At least there are 52 grams of protein...
With my recipe, we're looking at under 400 calories for the entire serving and only about 9 grams of fat, PLUS we get at least 4 grams of fiber and you've added 2 servings of veggies to your day's tally!
My husband, who is not a fan of salad by any means, could not stop raving about this. Usually, I'll make something intended to be eaten as a salad, but instead he'll cram all the veggies down separately as quickly as possible, and then eat the "more enjoyable" protein component. "You actually got me to mix the chicken INTO the salad!" he exclaimed before demanding this recipe go into the regular rotation.
I prefer using Buttermilk when I oven fry because panko sticks better to it than eggs. Even when I deep fry chicken, I prefer using panko and buttermilk rather than the traditional flour, eggs, breading route. It seems to stay crispier. This Panko technique is reminiscent of Shake 'N Bake (remember that commercial?!), so it's fun for little chefs. And if you're not feeling the salad, just make the chicken and have your own "boneless wing night" at home :)
Friday, May 6, 2011
Firecracker Chicken Stir-Fry with Spicy Peanut Sauce
I'm back! Sorry, April was a busy month -vacation, puppy training, crappy weather making me feel laaazzzyyy. But fear not! I have a new recipe - and it's delicious (just ask my husband)!
Here's a little backstory ~ I love to replicate restaurant meals. I was hooked after discovering the Red Lobster Cheddar Bay Biscuits (nom drool nom) recipe online back in 1999. I don't visit those restaurant replications sites so much anymore, preferring to "MonicaGeller" that shit (i.e. reverse engineer). Sometimes I fail, but even my failures tend to be tasty, if not what I originally intended. For example, I was devastated when Baja Fresh closed its doors in Illinois - I can literally drink their Salsa Baja ~ so I tried to make it. It's not quite there, but the result is still yummy (recipe to come soon).
Now, we've been going to Disney World annually for a few years now, and the one restaurant we HAVE to go to is 'Ohana. Who doesn't love fire-roasted meats on sticks, right? They have a bunch of appetizers with a distinct Pan-Asian flair, like Honey Coriander Chicken Wings, pork potstickers, Honey-lime salad dressing over butter lettuce, etc. Nearly everything has a burst of citrus or tropical fruits, like freshly-made hawaiian bread with pineapple and coconut. More recently, they added some Thai flavors, like Peanut stir-fried noodles, though they aren't as spicy as I'd like. So I came home with the idea that I'd figure out that recipe and make it spicier. A happy accident was making my beloved Asian Zing sauce from Buffalo Wild Wings! A hybrid was born and here's what happened:
Firecracker Chicken Stir-Fry with Spicy Peanut Sauce (serves 6)
For the Firecracker Chicken Marinade (reserve 1/2 liquid for peanut sauce):
2 packages of Chicken Tenderloins, cut into bite-size chunks
2 tsp fresh minced ginger
2 tsp fresh minced garlic
all the liquid from a 16oz can of pineapple chunks (you'll need the fruit for the stir-fry)
juice of 1/2 lime
2 tsp (or tbsp depending on how hot you want it) Chili paste (in Asian food aisle)
4 tsp Soy Sauce
3-4 tbs honey
1 tbs canola oil
fresh cracked pepper
*By the way - if you omit the oil and add more honey, it's pretty much the same as B-Dub's Asian Zing wing sauce
Directions:
In a large bowl, whisk all the ingredients together until emulsified and reserve half in another container for the peanut sauce. Drop chicken pieces in, stir 'em up, cover the container and let marinate in fridge for a few hours.
Peanut Sauce:
1/2 Firecracker marinade
2 tbs peanut butter (sweeter is better, but if you use natural, you'll need a few tsp of sugar)
In a saucepan, bring the marinade up to a slow simmer and add peanut butter. Whisk until thoroughly combined. If it's too thick, add some water or juice (citrus or tropical work best) until you reach the desired consistency. You want it thinner, but not so thin it won't stick to the noodles.
While you're working on that, bring a pot of water to boil and cook the Udon noodles. Get your wok going on medium-high heat when you drop the noodles in.
Firecracker Chicken
marinated chicken pieces
1 red bell pepper, finely diced
1/2 can pineapple, finely diced (I have an alligator chopper for this)
1 cup shelled pre-cooked edamame
2 scallions, greens only, chopped for garnish
1/4 dry roasted peanuts (the lightly salted kind), for garnish
Using tongs, remove chicken from marinade and drop into wok. You want some marinade left on the pieces, but not so much that you make soup. Stir every so often to ensure even cooking for about 8 minutes. Then add the pepper, pineapple, and edamame. Mix together and let simmer until noodles are done cooking, about 3-4 minutes.
After noodles are done, drain and rinse with cool water, then dump immediately into wok with chicken. Pour about 1/2 of the peanut sauce on top. Remove from heat and toss to coat. If the sauce is too thick, now's the time to add extra liquid if necessary as the noodles will drink it up.
Leave remaining peanut sauce out for others to add to their own plates if they want, as well as the chopped scallions and peanuts.
Here's a little backstory ~ I love to replicate restaurant meals. I was hooked after discovering the Red Lobster Cheddar Bay Biscuits (nom drool nom) recipe online back in 1999. I don't visit those restaurant replications sites so much anymore, preferring to "MonicaGeller" that shit (i.e. reverse engineer). Sometimes I fail, but even my failures tend to be tasty, if not what I originally intended. For example, I was devastated when Baja Fresh closed its doors in Illinois - I can literally drink their Salsa Baja ~ so I tried to make it. It's not quite there, but the result is still yummy (recipe to come soon).
Now, we've been going to Disney World annually for a few years now, and the one restaurant we HAVE to go to is 'Ohana. Who doesn't love fire-roasted meats on sticks, right? They have a bunch of appetizers with a distinct Pan-Asian flair, like Honey Coriander Chicken Wings, pork potstickers, Honey-lime salad dressing over butter lettuce, etc. Nearly everything has a burst of citrus or tropical fruits, like freshly-made hawaiian bread with pineapple and coconut. More recently, they added some Thai flavors, like Peanut stir-fried noodles, though they aren't as spicy as I'd like. So I came home with the idea that I'd figure out that recipe and make it spicier. A happy accident was making my beloved Asian Zing sauce from Buffalo Wild Wings! A hybrid was born and here's what happened:
Firecracker Chicken Stir-Fry with Spicy Peanut Sauce (serves 6)
For the Firecracker Chicken Marinade (reserve 1/2 liquid for peanut sauce):
2 packages of Chicken Tenderloins, cut into bite-size chunks
2 tsp fresh minced ginger
2 tsp fresh minced garlic
all the liquid from a 16oz can of pineapple chunks (you'll need the fruit for the stir-fry)
juice of 1/2 lime
2 tsp (or tbsp depending on how hot you want it) Chili paste (in Asian food aisle)4 tsp Soy Sauce
3-4 tbs honey
1 tbs canola oil
fresh cracked pepper
*By the way - if you omit the oil and add more honey, it's pretty much the same as B-Dub's Asian Zing wing sauce
Directions:
In a large bowl, whisk all the ingredients together until emulsified and reserve half in another container for the peanut sauce. Drop chicken pieces in, stir 'em up, cover the container and let marinate in fridge for a few hours.
Peanut Sauce:
1/2 Firecracker marinade
2 tbs peanut butter (sweeter is better, but if you use natural, you'll need a few tsp of sugar)
In a saucepan, bring the marinade up to a slow simmer and add peanut butter. Whisk until thoroughly combined. If it's too thick, add some water or juice (citrus or tropical work best) until you reach the desired consistency. You want it thinner, but not so thin it won't stick to the noodles.
While you're working on that, bring a pot of water to boil and cook the Udon noodles. Get your wok going on medium-high heat when you drop the noodles in.
Firecracker Chicken
marinated chicken pieces
1 red bell pepper, finely diced
1/2 can pineapple, finely diced (I have an alligator chopper for this)
1 cup shelled pre-cooked edamame
2 scallions, greens only, chopped for garnish
1/4 dry roasted peanuts (the lightly salted kind), for garnish
Using tongs, remove chicken from marinade and drop into wok. You want some marinade left on the pieces, but not so much that you make soup. Stir every so often to ensure even cooking for about 8 minutes. Then add the pepper, pineapple, and edamame. Mix together and let simmer until noodles are done cooking, about 3-4 minutes.
After noodles are done, drain and rinse with cool water, then dump immediately into wok with chicken. Pour about 1/2 of the peanut sauce on top. Remove from heat and toss to coat. If the sauce is too thick, now's the time to add extra liquid if necessary as the noodles will drink it up.
Leave remaining peanut sauce out for others to add to their own plates if they want, as well as the chopped scallions and peanuts.
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